I'm pretty well known for finding it terribly difficult to put a sock in it, and today I was painfully reminded of that.
I have a problem with feeling invisible, so I say outlandish or cryptic things to scare and alarm people in a horrible bid for attention. Lately it's been my blasé approach to health complications as a result of my relapse.
I've been dropping very obvious clues to my demise and hoping someone will give a fuck about me enough to ask what's going on.
Today I think I discovered that one of the people I've been doing it to is in recovery.
And I feel like a horrible human being for not giving a fuck to think that I could be effecting people's own experience.
And now I don't know what to do. I want people to know why I might be a little off, but I can't share that without the context of outing myself, and I can't talk about it without giving people the opportunity to opt out of the conversation with full understanding of what I'm talking about for fear of impacting their mental health.
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