Wednesday, November 6, 2013


So I've been 3 days without medication because with the move I've run out of money and not been able to get more. 
Thoughts of doubt in Gerard's love of me are probably the worst for me now. And the doubt is making me more intense and causing more resistance from his end and more doubt (and sadness and self doubt) from me. 
Fear of food and weight gain is up there as well, along with a lack of motivation and will to do anything. What's the point if its gonna suck anyway?
Am I actually, any good at anything?!
So off to the pharmacy with me. I need medicating, I need Gerard and I need this lump in my throat to ease off

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