Tuesday, May 28, 2013

I'm Still Trying

To one particular person and probably more so to myself, I really am a hot commodity.
I could quit feeling what I think I am, and I could distract myself entirely from everything related to you. I could do these things, but I don't actually want to.
I love what we have/had/could have. I want more of us. I'm trying not to worry about what you think I am, and I could very easily forget you by running off on one of my tangents, though that really is the last thing I want to be doing right now.

But just know that I am flimsy and unpredictable. I throw myself through every open door. If you turn around, I may be gone by the time you come to really see me, so look at me, give me eye contact. Tell me what you think and feel. Tell me the truth. If it really is just the intimacy of the bedroom and kitchen that you find appealing in me, so be it. I am good at those things, and I can be good at them for someone else, too.

If you want me to return the favour of honesty and faith, tell me and I'll be back once the hard times and distance are over.

You and your multiple faces and me and my ability to ground you, I'll stay stubborn and loyal because that is in my very nature to do so. If that's what you want, tell me, it's yours.

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