Be Authentic, Surrender The Outcome, Do The Hard Work

Be authentic.
Surrender the outcome.
Do uncomfortable work.

This is apparently the mantra of recovering addicts in some circles. It's also how I want to live my life.

The most truly terrifying thing I can do is openly and honestly be my most authentic self.

What happens after that is not for me to control.

This is how it is, how it's meant to be and how it was always going to be. I can't change that by being someone or something else. I can't change the way existence unfolds by pretending one way or the other. I can't make this tiny blue dot in a vast galaxy any more or less blue by lying about this or that.

This is. So it be.

I don't need others to like me. I only need to be the 1 me that will exist.

I don't need others to care. I just need to know that I do, because that's my duty.

My truest, most authentic self isn't here for you.

In this, your response to my sincerity is not for me to worry about. Only that I am sincere.

Even that alone is hard work. Nothing worth having is ever easy.

I can't be a better version of myself if I try to pretend that right now? I'm the best. I've always been the best, I will always be the best, don't you love me.

I can't wake up tomorrow and correct the mistakes I've made today if I don't acknowledge that I've made mistakes. If I don't acknowledge my fragile human existence.

I'm not here to Facetune my life- this is me. Dirty, rough edges, real. Truthfully trying to be better, with or without anyone else.

Acknowledging your shortcomings isn't a reason to downplay your accomplishments, it's merely an opportunity to see what growth can be done. Where are the gaps? What can I do better?

I don't listen to blocked messages that hurt me because I don't need to. I don't need to know. I don't need

Clinically removing people is part of the hard work.

Making a decision and sticking to it, despite societies best interests. That's hard work.

I don't have to hide myself, who I am, what I look like. My appearance is insignificant, it doesn't improve quality of life or solve the world's problems. If you don't like the way I look, that's a shame.

I don't need to impress anyone or uphold standards, I don't need to play by your rules, I just need to make sure I'm happy in my life and how I experience this world.

If I'm being my most authentic self, that's all that matters. If someone else is unimpressed with me as myself, that's not something I can change.

Surrender the outcome. No expectations no disappointments. Do the thing and don't care what happens as a result.

Make the move, but don't expect a response. Try a thing, don't hope to be good at it or enjoy it or do well.

Nobody owes me anything, nobody has to respond. People could respond (or not) for a number of reasons, and I really have no control over that outcome.

Do the hard work. Take the time to practice meditation, to journal, to read and show effort for friends. Reach out, be nice, spread kindness. Offset the dick footprint. Hell, try and offset the carbon footprint too.

Never take what you have for granted, because you don't deserve a single thing, Nobody owes me anything, it's not a right, it's a gift. Show appreciation. Show care. Put in the work. Have meaningful conversations about how to help.

I've been writing this post for weeks now, because I kept loosing the spark to write. I've been taking my time to make sure I'm not here trying to bullshit you and give you some half-felt nonsense that I couldn't stand behind.

I didn't want to put this out if I wasn't "in the mood", and I say that to mean that I don't do things I don't feel.

Be authentic, surrender the outcome, do the hard work.